Sunday Nights, Monday Mornings

Sorry but no, this is not a post about Gossip Girl, despite the picture. Maybe tomorrow.

All I want is to be in the presence of my significant other.

To be there for him. I could be wrong, but the vibe I'm getting suggests that he wants the opposite. I feel like I'm being selfish for wanting to talk to him/see him, considering his current situation, but I care. He's important, cause he's my best friend, and what goes on in his life, is of equal importance.

I don't think I'm a smothering kind of person, god forbid should I ever develop such a trait. Yes, i'll refer to it as a trait. 

I'm jealous to an extent. And I can be selfish. But isn't everyone to a degree? I mean what determines good deeds and wrong doing? We can all make the assumption that the organism moves towards self-serving rewards and away from punishments. I'm not going to go on a rant on how 'selfishness is in human nature' though blah blah blah blah blah....

'Blah.' What an amazing word. Did you know 'Meh' (can i call it a word?) has it's own Wikipedia page? No? Neither did I. For those not in touch with this generations lingo .."Meh" is an interjection, often an expression of apathy, indifference, or boredom. However, it can also be used to indicate agreement or disagreement. It can also be an adjective, meaning mediocre or boring.

Thank you Wikipedia. And word is, it looks like it's going to be a new addition to the Collins Dictionary. It's won its place between "megrim" (whose plural means "low spirits") and "meibomian" ("the large sebaceous glands of the human eyelid") thanks to generating a surprising amount of enthusiasm among lexicographers!

I have gone off on a completely different tangent from where I started writing this post. 

Much like the email I got from my man-friend the other day. He makes me smile.

After a long winded philosophical conversation with himself about a mobile phone being the portal to the soul, well not quite, but it was an abstract thought, he came to this:

".....My point being, I miss you, unequivocally miss you and felt that I had to be audacious and clever to arouse your deeply thinking brain, because you're bored of my stupidity and feel you can't have an intellectual conversation with me.. Yes, I do rape the english language, but only to make you laugh. Yes I act silly, to make you laugh. But don't think thats the extent of my intellect."

He doesn't read this, but he knows who he is. I know he 'rapes' the english language, but it's one of his qualities I adore. And I know there's more to him than the exterior, and that it goes alot deeper, intellectually and emotionally. However I do throughly enjoy his Chuck Bass impersonations. I'm still learning things about my best friend.

I want him to talk to me.

Please don't shut me out

Ahh.

12am It's bedtime. I have an audition tomorrow. I really should be more enthusiastic 

Dreams

I have the idea, that the universe is infinite because it is the home of our dreams. The idea might be rational and irrational at the same time. If it were the house of god, it would have human form, instead we have a dark canvas printed with varying tones of stars, supernovas and nebulas, for me this is a portrait of our dreams. Like intermittent traffic lights that never stop.

I want to travel to iceland or anywhere to view the northern lights, otherwise known as Aurora Borealis.

The Aurora Borealis or North Lights, is a natural light display in the sky, only visible from the Northern Hemisphere. The aurora borealis most often occurs near the equinoxes; from September to October and from March to April. 

On my list of 'lifes to do's and travels', is to capture aurora borealis with my own camera. Oh and how i wish i'd been around to witness the Solar Storm of 1859.